Change Of Life Read online

  Tom laughed. “I’m not going to win this one. You’ve got it all figured out. So, how’s the world of retailing?”

  “Boring as always,” Sam sighed. “I might pack it in actually. I don’t think I want to spend the summer in that place.”

  Tom and I exchanged a glance at this. But neither of us got the chance to ask what she planned to do instead, as she continued talking.

  “Oh, he was on today, Jenny – on the back shift. He was late actually - got a bollocking from the boss. He gives me the creeps, that boyfriend of yours!”

  “He’s not my boyfriend! He’s not a creep. He’s just shy. He’s actually quite friendly when you get to know him.”

  “Jenny’s got a boyfriend!” Max cut in. “What’s his name? Why’s he a creep?” Max asked the questions for the rest of us.

  Jenny tried to speak, but Sam leant forward to answer, waving a dismissive hand at her sister. “He’s called Robbie. He’s always staring and he follows me – I’m sure he does. In fact I think he followed me home last night.”

  “Jenny’s boyfriend’s a stalker! A weird, creepy pervert!” Max’s eyes were wide as he relished this revelation.

  “Don’t talk like that!” I said. “What rubbish. Sam, what do you mean he followed you home? Why didn’t you say? Who is he? Jenny, is this person your boyfriend?” I knew I was babbling and I suspected I’d met the boy already.

  Once again, Jenny’s attempts to speak were overridden by her sister. “He’s called Robbie - as I said. He’s a right weirdo. He’s not from here. He comes in on the bus from Edinburgh. He just appeared one day, got a part time job in the shop. He says he’s on exam leave, but that he can’t spend all his time studying, and he says he needs the money. But it’s not like they don’t have supermarkets in Edinburgh – why would he want to work here? He must spend loads on bus fares. Like I say – weird. He and Jenny spend a lot of time talking to each other when they’re on the weekend shift together. Jen likes him – don’t you Jen?”

  All our eyes were on Jenny. “Yes – as a friend – not in the way you’re all thinking!” She blushed. “He’s not weird. Why would he follow you, Sam? You shouldn’t say things like that about him.”

  “Oh, I know he’s not really your boyfriend,” Sam replied. “I think he fancies me actually – probably using you to get close to me. But it’s all right you can have him. He gives me the creeps with the staring and stuff – and that earring is so not cool! And he likes Slipknot – I rest my case – weird!” Sam glanced at her brother, but he didn’t rise to the bait. “Anyway, I’m sure he followed me.”

  Now I knew. “I think I-”

  “No, no wait a minute.” Tom waved his hand to silence me. “I don’t like the sound of any of this. Jenny, you’re not to encourage this boy. I could have a word with Andy. Get him to investigate the guy.”

  “No, Dad, no!” Jenny looked horrified. “Don’t go talking to the police about him. He’s fine. He doesn’t mean any harm.”

  “I’ll speak to Andy unofficially –as a friend – come on, you know Andy. He’ll be low key. You can trust him.”

  Jenny grabbed Tom’s arm. “Please, Dad, don’t. He’s okay!”

  “Well – no coming home alone for the moment, either of you,” Tom said, pouring himself another glass of red. “I’ll have a word with this Robbie myself.”

  “No!”

  The girls glared at Tom as if he was a lunatic. I used their horrified silence to get a word in. “I think I may have met Robbie already,” I said quickly. “Well I think it was probably him that I hit earlier – with the car.” Now the glares swung to me. “He was a young lad with straggly, dark hair…” I had Tom’s attention now. No-one was eating anymore, not even Adam, who normally rams his food down his throat as fast as he can, and then leaves the table as soon as possible.

  “You hit someone? When? What happened? Was he okay?”

  “Yes, yes, he was okay. I didn’t actually hit him. He ran into me really. It was at lunchtime – when I was going back to school. I didn’t see him coming. He must have been pressed against the hedge or bending down or something. He clattered into the side of the car as I was pulling away outside the house. I got out to make sure he was all right, but he ran off.”

  “What makes you think it was the same boy?” Tom asked.

  I looked at the girls. “He was about Adam’s height, thin, dark. He had a skull-shaped ear stud and a Slipknot tee-shirt.”

  Sam raised her eyebrows and nodded. “It sounds like him. When was it exactly?”

  “About one-fifteen.”

  “What was he doing here at that time?” Sam said. “He’d know I’d be at the shop then. No wonder he was late for his shift. This gets creepier. You don’t think he was going to break in do you?” She looked scared now.

  Jenny shook her head. “Of course not. He’d be stupid to show himself if he was planning to break in. There’ll be a reasonable explanation. Maybe he was just exploring the village and stopped to tie his shoelace or something.”

  “Yeah, right!” said Sam.

  Tom’s mind was apparently made up. “I’m going to have a word with Andy. No arguments.” He raised both hands once more, to fend off any protests from his daughters. “Come on, everyone eat up.” He turned to me. “Did you remember to pick up my dry cleaning?”

  Chapter Five

  When I got home from dropping Sam in town, I made myself a peppermint tea and began to think through my teaching plans for the rest of the week. I took my notebook and sat down at the kitchen table. I sipped my tea as I made my notes. It was dark outside and the lamp on the old dresser threw its soft light around me. The wall clock ticked quietly in the background and the boiler sang to itself in the cupboard in the corner. I heard footsteps upstairs and a door closing. Max would be going to bed. I drank the last of my tea and was just finishing off my preparation when Adam came into the kitchen.

  “Hello, how’s the studying going?” I asked.

  “It’s not. I’m trying to study biology, but nothing’s going in and it’s so boring!”

  “Do the diagrams not help – the ones the learning assistant made up to lessen the amount of reading you’ve to do?”

  “It’s not the reading that’s making it hard,” he said, taking the seat next to me. “It’s just plain boring. All the diagrams in the world aren’t going to help. I don’t understand most of it and I can’t be bothered. I’m not going to pass anyway…”

  “Oh, Adam,” I put my hand on his arm. “Don’t get discouraged. Of course you’ll pass. You’re tired. Have a hot drink and an early night.” I rubbed his back as I spoke. He twisted away from me.

  “No, Mum! A cup of tea and an early night – what – what’s that all about? That’s not going to help. I’m not going to pass! I’m not going to pass any of them! Don’t you understand? I’m not clever like Sam and Jenny, and you can’t make it all right with your bloody stupid suggestions and a cuddle. I can’t be what you want me to be. I’m too thick.”

  “What – you’re not thick! You have dyslexia, Adam – it’s no reflection on your intelligence – come on, you know that.”

  “No I don’t. It’s all a load of shit. Why can’t you see it? I’m not going to university – to be a doctor like dad, or a teacher like you. It’s not going to happen.”

  I reached out to him. “Adam, son, I-”

  “No – no! Don’t. It’s not all going to be fine. You can’t make it all right. I’m not going to get my exams. You and dad, you need to get used to the idea.” With that he pushed past me and headed out of the kitchen. He met Tom in the doorway and kept on walking.

  “What’s wrong with him?” Tom raised his eyebrows.

  “Oh, exam nerves I expect. He thinks he’s going to fail his exams. He says we need to get used to the fact that he’s thick – not university material.”

  “What? He simply needs to apply himself, get studying, instead of mooning about in his room, messing about with those fish of his and re
ading those car magazines. He should have cut back on working at that karting place as well, spent more time on his school work. He needs to get a grip on what’s important. I’ll speak to him. Sort him out.”

  “No, Tom, please - don’t! He needs to calm down and get a good night’s rest. It’s too late now anyway. He’s probably just a bit insecure because of the dyslexia. He doesn’t moon about –not really. I’ll have a quiet word when he’s not so wound up.” I knew Tom would go over the top and shout, and Adam would shout back, and nobody would get anywhere.

  “Hmm – you’ll be too soft,” Tom said. “I know you. He needs a kick up the backside.”

  I considered arguing – mentioning how vulnerable Adam was. But I knew from previous conversations that it would be pointless.

  “Anyway,” Tom said, “I came through to tell you your dear brother phoned– wanted to talk over how it’s going with the rental of your dad’s flat – wouldn’t discuss it with me of course.”

  “No? Right – no, I don’t suppose he would.” I was never very sure why Michael and Tom had fallen out. They’d been friends as medical students at Edinburgh University. That’s how I’d first met Tom – at a party in Michael’s student flat. But around the time that the twins were born they began avoiding each other. Then Michael emigrated. “What time did he call? Have I to call him back?”

  “It was first thing in the morning in Sydney. Yes you’ve to give him a call. I know it was your dad’s flat but finance is really my department isn’t it?

  “Yes, I know!” Tom did handle all the finances, and I got bored very easily by all that money management stuff. But he had a way of making me feel helpless sometimes. “I’m not a complete idiot you know. It won’t only be the financial details. He’ll want to know if the new tenancy is working out. I’m sure I can deal with it. I do manage a demanding job and looking after the house and family.” I wanted to add – ‘with precious little help from you’ – but I stopped myself.

  Tom shrugged. “Andy called too. He went to the supermarket to see if your mystery boy is the one the girls know.”

  “Oh, Tom, the girls asked you not to go to Andy. Could you not just leave it?”

  Tom merely shook his head slightly, as if I hadn’t spoken. “And the plot thickens,” he continued. “It’s him - Robbie - and he’s admitted to hanging about the house. It seems the lad wants to talk to us, all of us, together. Andy’s going to bring him round tomorrow evening around seven. He wants to apologise, apparently. More likely Andy’s told him he has to apologise!”

  “Is that it? Who is he? What does he want with us all? I thought it was Jenny he was interested in.”

  “Andy didn’t say, but I hope he’s warned him to stay away in future – away from the house and away from the girls!”

  “He’s probably harmless you know - got a crush on Jenny, or maybe Sam – as she seems to think.”

  “Well, he’s not welcome here – it’s not harmless stalking a young girl.”

  “Oh, for goodness sake – he’s not a stalker - you sound like Max!”

  I left Tom in the kitchen and phoned my brother. It was lovely to hear Michael’s voice. He’d been living in Australia for about sixteen years. He’d only been home for two short visits in all that time - the last occasion being for our father’s funeral four years before. On neither occasion did we get a chance to talk properly, and I don’t really know why. Whenever I suggested a trip to Australia, Tom always came up with some reason why it was not a good time. He wasn’t even keen on Sam spending her gap year at Michael’s home. But, of course, Sam got round him in a way that I never could. Michael hadn’t been as close to me as Heather, but he was my big brother and I loved him.

  As always, it was good to hear his voice. “So, Rick’s working out as the new tenant - looking after the flat?” he asked.

  “Yes, yes it’s fine – much neater than when the students had it. I did a check a couple of weeks ago. Rick wasn’t there, but it all seemed in order. Being Lucy’s brother, he’ll not want to risk her wrath by abusing the place!”

  “Mm, I suppose not. Upsetting both you and your best friend is probably something best avoided.” I could hear the smile in his voice.

  “Yes indeed!” I laughed. “He’s away working at the moment. Taking photographs up in Skye I think.”

  “And it’s not too much for you – being a landlord?”

  “No – not at all – I wish all my responsibilities were so straightforward.”

  “You do too much, Rosie. God knows how you coped looking after Dad the way you did, on top of everything else – all that going back and forward to Edinburgh and then having him to live with you. I do appreciate all you did back then. You know I do. That’s why I wanted you to have the flat - I don’t deserve it – you do. I don’t need it. I’m only asking about it to make sure you’re not having any hassle.”

  “Yes, I know you are. And I told you it belongs to both of us – I don’t want your half. I don’t really need a flat either.”

  “Well, you never know. I like to think that my little sister has a place to call her own.” Michael spoke gently as he added, “Should she ever require it.”

  “I can’t see that happening! Like we said though, it’s a good investment to hang on to it – and if any of the kids go to uni in Edinburgh it’ll really come into its own.”

  Michael talked a bit more about our shared rental income from the flat and about the ever changing tax implications, which I did my best to follow. I also knew that this year, as always, I would end up having to get Tom’s help sorting it all out. Then I remembered looking at the old photos of Heather and me earlier, and told Michael about it.

  “Do you ever think about her?” I asked.

  “No, hardly at all,” he replied. “How’s Sam doing by the way? Jo and I miss having her help around the place. The girls miss her too.”

  We chatted on, discussing our children, the weather, our jobs –but there was no real heart to heart. He certainly hadn’t wanted to talk about Heather. I didn’t mention my imminent hospital appointment or the incident with the boy. I know I’d made a conscious decision not to mention the hospital, but I’ve no idea why I didn’t tell the story of the mysterious boy.

  Chapter Six

  Before leaving for work the next morning, I tried to ensure that Jenny and Adam had eaten something and were calm and organised for their last exam. Jenny was quiet and rather tense, like an athlete focussing on the big race. She refused breakfast as usual, and would only have some orange juice as she looked over her revision notes. Adam was surly and withdrawn and impervious to my attempts to lighten his mood. And, although Robbie’s forthcoming visit crossed my mind first thing, it was no more than a passing thought.

  Once at school, all thoughts of anything, other than the class in front of me, left my head. The children in my class were a sparky lot and I was completely taken up with teaching primary three.

  After school, Max popped his head round the door of my classroom. “Are you going to be long?” he asked.

  “Hello to you too, I’ve had a good day, thanks for asking. And you?” I smiled as he rolled his eyes and sighed.

  “Yeah, yeah, but are you? Neil and Connor are going to play footy on the field and I can go too if you’re working on here. Oh, and can I go to Ruby’s for tea tomorrow? Neil’s going to his gran’s and he said I can go too.”

  “Yes, you can go for tea. I’ll be away at a meeting tomorrow afternoon anyway.” It was sort of the truth and I was glad I wouldn’t have to make arrangements for Max when I’d be at the hospital the next day. “And yes, go and play, I’ll be about half an hour.” He ran off. “Watch your school clothes,” I called after him. “No diving! I’ll see you at the field.” There was no reply, only the corridor door slamming.

  Max made me smile. He was so carefree, so sure of his world. He didn’t seem to mind me working at his school, as long as I remembered my place during school hours. He was such an easy child.


  Later, over dinner, I asked as casually as I could how Jenny and Adam got on with their exam.

  “Fine, Mother,” Jenny said. “Don’t worry, I think I did enough to pass. But don’t ask me anything about cell division or anything else biological. It’s all gone now it’s over.”

  “What about you, Adam?” Tom asked.

  “What about me?” Adam didn’t look up.

  “How was the biology exam?”

  “Okay.”

  “Do you think you’ve done enough to pass?”

  “Can we just leave it!” Adam shook his head at Tom, pushed his chair back and left the table. The kitchen door banged shut behind him.

  “What’s up with him?” Max asked, in a way that suggested he didn’t really want to know, but was amused at his brother’s outburst.

  “I did ask you to go easy, Tom,” I said. “I told you he’s feeling the pressure.”

  “Oh, for heavens sake, it was a perfectly reasonable question. I’m interested – concerned that he does well. Is that so awful?”

  “Dad, you know Adam loves a drama,” Sam said. “He loves being miserable. He’ll be fine. And, Mum, stop mollycoddling him. He’s a big boy now. He needs to learn to cope with the stress of life.” With that, Sam pushed her empty plate away and stood up.

  I didn’t know who I was angrier with, Tom or Sam. If we’d been alone I’d have tackled Tom there and then. Apart from stressing our vulnerable son, his insensitive mishandling of Adam was achieving nothing. As for Sam, she was so like Tom, just as insensitive to Adam’s needs.

  So I was distracted, thinking how I’d tackle Tom and Sam separately. I’d momentarily forgotten that Tom still had to break it to the girls that he’d stuck his oar in about Robbie. They had no idea about Robbie’s impending visit. I began to clear the table. Jenny got up to give me a hand. Sam pushed her plate in my direction and stood up at the same time as Tom. Only Max remained at the table. He appeared to be responding to a text on his mobile – the mobile he wasn’t supposed to bring to the table.